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Why Did I Try to Be the Girl Next Door?
Maybe I thought he’d notice me at last.
Maybe I’ve watched too many movies and devoured too many books, but there was always something alluring about the oft-forgotten and overlooked “girl next door” — that every-woman type whose shoes almost any young women could imagine stepping into.
You’ve seen her before in many incarnations. For example, if you ever read Archie comics in ye olden days — or perhaps saw the ridiculously melodramatic Riverdale TV show — then you might be familiar with a character by the name of Betty Cooper. Back when I was a young twee thing, I always thought it was better to be a Betty — reliable, sweet, nice almost to a fault — than a vixen like her friend Veronica. No matter how the main character Archie’s feelings swayed among all his various paramours, I always thought he would be best with Betty because she was the stable one, the surefire one, the one who’d stick it out with him through every ill and every storm.
Once upon a time, I wanted to be that kind of girl for someone else. Maybe I’d charm him with my wit or my flirtation, but I’d always come back to the certainty that I would be there for him, no matter the trials ahead. I wanted to be a support system for someone the way I’d never felt one for myself.
