When Right Was Wrong

A Poem

Photo by Ana Carolina from Pexels

patience, they said

in the way of saints walking —

far from the blasphemous tide,

wanton in only affairs unseen.

be true, they said

when all I wanted was absolution

or some evidence of my existence

being so much more than a grain.

be good, they said

and I hid behind layers of meaning

that were really just cloaks

to mask the pain I felt each day.

love yourself, they said —

though they said it mockingly,

like they knew the joke was on me

and I bristled with uncertainty.

go away, I said —

or that was what I wanted to say

but I was still too new,

like restless winds cresting.

leave it, I thought,

and so I pretended every day

even while something in me wilted

and I knew no true escape.