Inner Circle

A Poem

Photo by Vinicius "amnx" Amano on Unsplash

in my dreams
i’m alone again,
and i’m surprising
no one, not even myself.

it’s another scene
where you’re laughing
with all your stupid friends
at the most popular table in school.

of course she’s there,
throwing her head back,
dark hair streaming, sweeping,
in just that way i know you like the most.

in my head
maybe i thought
it would be a little fun
just to stand in your spotlight.

it’s another day
of lockers slamming
like racing heartbeats in frenzy
like all these times we won’t remember.

but i do, i do —
or i wouldn’t be standing here
over ten years gone in a dreamscape
where chasing ghosts is a nightly routine.

in my time,
maybe i would
have been a better catch
if only i had followed the rules.