I Waited All Night

A Poem

Photo by Almos Bechtold on Unsplash

why
did I ever want to be the one
who stood alone
under a spotlight
on this unforgiving stage of life

why
did I not walk home, head high,
before he called
me worthless, powerless,
till I felt so small like an ant

why
did I take the first cab,
the bruise painted
like stage make-up
and the driver asked, “Are you okay?”

why
did I nod my head
like a child
fearful of punishment
when my heart had taken worse

why
did I tell you I’d be back,
such a fool,
thinking myself brave,
because no one else knew you like I did

why
did I wait all night
for the vindication
but no, no,
you were already my ghost