Fade to Black

A Poem

Photo by Dids via Pexels

oh, i lose myself again and again
in the allure of someone else
even though it’s so easy
for the curtain to fall
and for everything
to fade to black.

oh, i tell sweet lies in soft bursts
as if they’ll save my bleak soul,
but there’s no point at all
since i shouldn’t have
tried to steal away
what wasn’t mine.

i thought i was so clever at times,
but he could see right through me.

i thought i was winning the game,
but he wasn’t playing in the first place.

i thought i had found the right one,
but he belonged to someone else.

oh, i never love them right at all
as if my heart’s just too much,
but it was the wrong place
and the wrong time
for him and me,
if ever at all.

oh, i lie to myself most of all now
as if they’ll ever take me as i am,
but that was too much to ask
the first time and the last
because i’m…